NBA Generations and Global Gathering

A few weeks ago (too many to accurately remember) we were in Hongdae and saw a poster for a basketball game being held in Seoul. On the poster were pictures of former NBA all-stars so naturally we were intrigued. Turns out it was a game between the Korean all-star team and a group of former NBA players supplemented by current NBA D-League players--I was sold. So we set off towards the Olympic complex for an afternoon of sports entertainment.

I will briefly digress here to talk about riding the subway. Much like "The L" in Chicago all the novelty and shine of mass transit fades away after a few months. The Seoul Metro is just a necessary evil at this point and quite a nasty one at that. It is always too crowded to sit down, the transfers are confusing, and it seems to take forever. The ride to Jamsil was no exception. One train was so crowded that we literally couldn't get on at the station. All the Koreans rammed and jammed their tiny little bodies in and there was no room for us. When we finally did get on it was so crowded that you didn't have to hold on to anything to brace yourself--you couldn't have fallen down if you tried.

We arrived at the Olympic complex and quickly found the basketball arena. To be honest, we really just followed Korean people wearing NBA jerseys. We bought some of the cheaper tickets in the upper deck and marched up the stairs to our seats. We were getting settled in and remarking how our seats were actually pretty decent when a Korean usher comes up. Here we go.

Turned out that the lower bowl wasn't full and they wanted people in the seats for the TV cameras so he told us we could move down and sit wherever we wanted--score one for the good guys. Buy the cheapest tickets and score seats a few rows off the floor. The game itself was pretty hilarious. The NBA "legends" consisted of Dominque Wilkins, Robert Horry, Vlade Divac, and Tim Hardaway. The coach was Kareem Abdul-Jabbar but he never actually did any coaching. He just sat on the bench with a towel over his head and gave a brief interview at half-time.

Obviously D-Wilkins is like 55 years old and Vlade Divac was horribly out of shape so it was quite humorous watching these little Korean all-stars just sprinting past them up and down the floor. The Koreans had ZERO inside presence but they didn't really need it as they proceeded to shoot the lights out from 3 and basically blow the NBA squad away. My favorite part was during warm-ups when the Korean fans were "ooohing and ahhhhing" over the most routine, basic dunks. Any person over 6'8" can jump and put the ball through a 10 foot rim but the Koreans thought they were at the All-Star dunk contest. All in all a really fun event and certainly something I didn't envision doing when I left for Korea.

This past weekend was a two day dance music festival in Seoul called Global Gathering. After out last experience with the World DJ Festival we knew this wasn't something we'd want to miss. It turned out to be a really good adventure and hopefully a semi-interesting story.

We set off from Suwon around 4 and despite doing our best to research the event online we basically knew nothing about where the festival was. Luckily we recently discovered that you can dial "1330" on your phone and get this English speaking helpline designed for tourists in Seoul. So our strategy was to take the high-speed train (rather than the subway :)) into Seoul, get food, and then call 1330 and have them help us get there. The high-speed train takes about 30 minutes instead of over an hour on the subway which is a huge plus. Charlie and I played golf on his "hand phone" and we arrived at Seoul Station around 5:15.

Next we call 1330 and they tell us to take the subway to the World Cup Stadium and then take a taxi from there. They assure Charlie that taxis will know "Global Gathering." So we decipher the subway map and head to the platform to wait. It is 6 stops away so in my mind I'm thinking that should take about 30 minutes. So we wait on the platform, play umpteen more rounds of cell phone golf, and 40 minutes later the stupid train arrives. We board the train, sit down, and prepare to set off. Unfortunately the train sat there for another 25 minutes not moving. So we've now wasted almost an hour and we haven't moved. Charlie finally set a deadline for getting off and that came and went so we departed the train and caught a taxi to the World Cup Stadium.

After a delicious meal at Pizza Hut we decided to grab a few alcoholic beverages for the road because I read (incorrectly) online that Global Gathering was alcohol-free. Charlie and I grab a few Budweisers and bottle of Soju to split on our journey and we once again set off in search of a cab. At this point Ben realizes that he knows where the park is because it is the same location as the DJ Festival and we had to walk there from the WC Stadium last time. He admits it is quite the hike so we go through the horrible process of trying to wave down and cab and get 1330 on the line to give the driver directions.

Ben gets put on hold, numerous cab drivers blow by us, and I keep drinking all the while laughing about how silly this whole ordeal is becoming. Finally we manage to get through to 1330 and wave down a cab. We're off again! Unfortunately 5 minutes later the guy starts saying something in Korean and pointing. He then makes a U-turn and we realize he doesn't know where he's supposed to be taking us. We just get out and decide to go the rest on foot. About 30 minutes, 2 bathroom stops, and 2 beers later we arrived after hiking up and around this seemingly big hill in the middle of a huge park. All-in-all it took us about 5 hours to get from Suwon to GG but it is a funny story and good memory.

Once inside we met up with some of Ben's soccer teammates (people we know from NOW Bar) and former Talkster legend, the Tominator. We unfortunately missed the two HUGE Korean pop music sensations, G-Dragon and 2NE1, but what can you do? We still told the students that we saw them and it made all of them extremely jealous! Tom informs us that he had already been kicked out of GG three times, once for puking on stage during 2NE1. He just kept buying new tickets (about $80 each) and coming back in for more. How he got on stage is anyone's guess. The other evictions were for puking or similar drunken antics. What a guy.

We then proceed to do some more shots, drink a few beers, and get our dancing groove on for the night's shows. It was really a great time and much like DJ Festival the weather was absolutely perfect. The headliner was a group called Underworld and it was a really awesome time. After a night of dancing and drinking we headed home.

Take it easy, but take it.

Reflecting

In another ill-fated attempt to revive this blog I'm going to do a reflection on what is now the first half of my Korean adventure. This will be incredibly disjointed, scattered, and somewhat illogical, but know that is written with absolute honesty and sincerity in hopes that I can convey some of the meaning and significance of this year to everyone who reads this. I've already discussed my difficulty in fully expressing what this experience is like so please bare with me and proceed with caution.

It has been nearly six months since I left U.S. soil and I still can't answer what is the most obvious question: why go to Korea? I think any logical, sound-minded individual would be expected to have a solid answer for that question before they ever left home. I also believe that anyone with a solid answer for that question would never wind up in Korea. People here are of a special breed with a really unique mindset towards life experiences that allows us to understand each other's reasoning without any questions or conversations. I've met such a wide spectrum of people here in Korea but perhaps the one consistent trait is that none of us can really explain in words why we're here. You here answers like, "I didn't choose Korea, Korea chose me" and I think that says it about as well as I ever could. I doubt anyone had a list of pros and cons as that type of thinking and reasoning isn't applicable to such a radical change. You have to be willing to take a chance on yourself and just jump over the edge of the cliff without looking. You can't hesitate, you can't second guess, you have to be the type of person who knows what they want, even if they don't know why they want it, and just lunge head first towards your goal.

Is Korea what I expected? No, not at all and yes, completely, all in the same breath. The reason being that I came here with almost no expectations. I just packed my entire life into two, overweight suitcases and 18 hours later I was here. I didn't know what Korean culture would be like, how I would survive, what I would eat, who I would meet, what I would see, etc. So in that sense it was completely unexpected and foreign. At the same time I knew I would be pushed to new limits and exposed to new ways of thinking that I would carry with me forever. I would be forced to grow as a person and begin to develop a deeper understanding of who Kevin Michael Kushion actually is. Korea has definitely not disappointed in the latter category. Living, working, and playing in a culture as different from my own as Korean is like holding a giant mirror up to yourself and your way of life. By recognizing why Koreans are the way they are it allows me to identify why I am the way I am. Not only experiencing but being completely immersed in a foreign culture allows you an opportunity to view and analyze your own culture from the outside. I may not speak Korean or look Korean or feel Korean, but for all intents and purposes for this year, I am Korean. There isn't a U.S. oasis where we escape to live life--every part of everyday is entirely and sincerely Korean. Most days Charlie and Ben are the only two people I interact with that aren't Korean. That means every other person I encounter at all during the entire the day is culturally, physically, linguistically different from me. Store clerks, bus drivers, waitresses, strangers--everyone is a chance to learn, grow, and further understand this country where I've chosen to live for a year. The lessons I learn here may be specific to Korea but they truly are applicable to life anywhere.

I view my unique position as an outsider as much more of a blessing than a curse. I now am much more conscious of how people view me and my culture. I've developed an ability to communicate with people without using words. I can read body language and social cues in order to gauge situations. I really feel that if I can survive six months in Suwon without knowing any Korean I can do anything. We've overcome some real obstacles that may seem minor and inconsequential to people back home but that leave me with a deep sense of accomplishment and a knowledge that I really can tackle anything that comes my way. I think back to that first week when Charlie and I would just wander looking for places that had English menus and marvel at how far we've come. We've done more than survive, we've made this our life and thrived.

I think in my first six months the one thing I will remember most is the people. First, I've been incredibly blessed to have two guys like Ben and Charlie here with me. To have people to share your day with is awesome, to have guys who have quickly become some of my best friends is even better. I cringe to think about what my experience would be like without Ben and Charlie. Next, I will just say everyone at Talkster. Haji, Anna, Betty, Josh, Michelle, and Edward have been wonderful to work with and have taught me a great deal about being a successful teacher as well as a better human being. I'm sincerely enjoyed working with them and getting to know them, especially away from work on a more personal level. As much as I have learned from all of them, I've learned ten times more from the students. This one sort of caught me off guard, but I have grown quite attached to the students and I look forward to seeing them everyday. My favorite part of everyday, and perhaps my favorite part of Korea, is from 2:50-3:00 p.m. when the youngest students gather outside in the street and play before class. I always just stand in the doorway smiling--few things in life have ever brought me as much joy as watching those munchkins run around and have shoe kicking contests. I see in those 10 minutes such unhindered happiness and potential for growth that is really humbles me and reminds me what I should be striving for in my own life. Teaching has been its own battle with really rewarding highs and disappointing lows. I think teaching actually may run counter to my personality so I really have to 'gear up' and get in the proper mindset before each class. Also, teaching students ranging from 6 to 15 years old requires you to change gears each hour and helps to keep me on my toes. I've grown to really enjoy some of the students' company. Obviously I teach a lot of great kids who are an absolute pleasure to teach. On the other hand I have kids who originally drove me crazy and at times down-right pissed me off. I'm proud to report that I've found ways to relate to and engage those students such that I can now welcome them as a part of the class. I really turned the corner with a few students and developed a mutual respect with them of which I'm extraordinarily proud. A little diplomacy in recognizing and cultivating a common ground can really go a long way in bridging the gap between disrespectful student and inexperienced teacher. I am very confident that over the next 6 months I will really hone my ski ls and become a more efficient educator.

I'll leave it there for now. I promise I will post again in the next few days with more specifics as to what we've been up to lately.

Take it easy, but take it.

Why I ate dog

So on Wednesday night I joined our Korean coworker Edward, Charlie, and his friend Sean for a truly Korean experience of eating dog. First, I must immediately dispel some ridiculous rumors about Koreans and their canine eating habits. First, less that 5% of ALL Koreans have EVER eaten dog. Second, they aren't eating Lassie or Old Yeller. These are special dogs that are bred and raised on farms just like any other livestock. They don't bark, they're hairless and pretty disgusting to look at. People seem to have this idea of Golden Retrievers and Labs getting killed for meat which is totally off base. I should also mention that Koreans originally ate dogs as a last resort. During long periods of occupation by other imperial Asian countries the Koreans were literally starved for protein and dog is a great source of this essential part of the human diet.

Now that I said all of that, I want to try to explain why I ate dog. First, I ate dog because it was an experience that will certainly stay with me for the rest of my life. Inevitably when people here about my time in Korean the topic of eating dogs will come up--now I can give a solid, experienced answer. I can safely say that dog is served in some restaurants. It is also pretty delicious.

But that isn't the real reason I ate dog, just as I assume it isn't the reason Charlie or Sean decided to partake either. We all share a general open mindedness about cultural differences and we're genuinely interested in stepping well outside of our comfort area to dive head first into everything Korea has to offer. Edward graciously offered to take us to his brother's restaurant for a rare opportunity to experience a piece of Korea's history and I felt a self obligation to take him up on his offer. I wasn't excited about the prospect of eating dog, but I was excited about the prospect of broadening my worldview and deepening my understanding of Korea. Certain opportunities only arise once in a lifetime and you'd be a fool to knowing let one slip by, regardless of your personal prejudices about eating particular animals.

I've recently done a lot of thinking about my experience in Korea and how it is perceived by other people. I have come to the conclusion that it is difficult to explain or express anything about Korea to someone who has no frame of reference for what I'm trying to express. I'm not at all implying that I don't want to talk about Korea, but rather I find it difficult to express how I truly feel to people who have never been. People strive to ask questions but without any basis for understanding they can't really ever ask the questions that will prompt responses about how Korea really is and what I've really learned here.

I will try to use an extreme example to outline my point. When Neil Armstrong returned from the moon what kind of questions do you think his friends and family asked him? I would guess some popular ones would be:

"What was it like to be weightless?"

"What did the moon's surface feel like?"

"When did you come up with the 'One small step...' quote?"

"How was the space food?"

But none of those questions even scratch the surface of Mr. Armstrong's real experience. I'm sure floating around in the ship was awesome, hitting the golf ball was fun, and the food was awful, but do any of those elements contribute in the slightest to the awe-inspiring experience of being the first man on the moon? If he wasn't so witty and hadn't uttered those now famous words, would his experience be diminished? Had they served Fillet Mignon, would he look back on the trip more fondly? I think the experience itself, as a whole, is what Neil probably remembers. But when people probe him they can't ask, "What's it like to have a life changing and history altering experience 230,000 miles from Earth?" because they have no frame of reference to even pose the question. You don't knowingly ask questions when you know you won't understand the answer. Instead, they struggle to find things they can relate to and ask about them. But when all the former Apollo astronauts get together I doubt they talk about Lunar 4-irons or freeze-dried ice cream. They are able to discuss and understand their mutual experience on a much deeper level that outsiders cannot begin to understand. Charlie, Ben and I have a similar group dialogue about Korea, obviously on a much smaller and less historic scale.

I think of my Korean experience as if I am looking at a painting from across the room. The details are fuzzy or dull. Rather than focusing on brushstrokes or shadows I'm able to appreciate the entirety of the picture. I'm able to reflect on the sum rather than the components. That is why I think it is hard for me to relate my experience to friends and family back home. They see and hear the details but they can't see the whole picture. For every meal of dog or night out in Seoul there are 20 days spent living in Hwaseo-dong, riding the bus, finding new meals, meeting new people, and experiencing life as a foreigner. None of it is noteworthy or interesting to you all, but to me it is what will define my experience here. It is what I'll remember 20 years from now. It is what I hope to take with me when I leave here.

Take it easy but take it.

Phuket - Day 5

Day 5

We slept in quite late today and rolled around around 1 p.m. We headed towards Patong and make a quick stop downtown for a late lunch. After that we headed further north to try and find some of more isolated beaches on the north-west side of the island. We successfully navigated to two of the northern beaches and they were basically exactly like every other beach on this amazing island, except they had even fewer people. Maybe a three mile beach with a total of 8 people? Phuket is just so empty this time of year. It makes me happy to know that I'll probably be returning around this same time next year so I'll enjoy the conditions.

After the two beaches we decided to try and find another waterfall. This time we were actually successful and found this marvelous jungle waterfall at the end of a very rural road. Despite our lack of climbing clothes (swim shorts and flip flops don't exactly fit the bill) we were able to climb up through the jungle and see some incredible sights. Again, we were the only two people at the entire waterfall. The humidity must have been at least 200% and I was very close to taking a proper dip to cool myself. This waterfall was just as cool and awe inspiring as the other we saw earlier in the week. One minute you're on the world's most fantastic beach, an hour of motorbiking cruising later and you're at the top of a jungle waterfall.

After the waterfall we cruised in dusk/dark back along the western coast on our way to Kata. We resolved to finally get a Thai massage. Now, I would bet every dollar I have that Phuket has as many massage parlors as it does restaurants. You cannot go more than 100 yards in any direction without running into a massage pal or. Our major concern was getting a proper massage without any "funny" business. We walked around trying to find a highly populated parlor and finally settled on one that looked the least shady. The point out two beds and start pulling the curtain closed and Ben summed up both our feelings with, "Really? A curtain?" Luckily no funny business occured and we got pretty decent massages for about $8 for an hour. Obviously when half the island's female population is in the massage business they can't all be certified professionals but they did a fine job, especially considering the price.

After that we hit up a steak house in Kata, enjoyed dinner, and also enjoyed the site of the baby elephant across the street. Some dude had his baby elephant out so you could buy peanuts to feed it or take pictures. Ridiculous.

Take it easy, but take it.

Phuket - Day 4

Day 4

Today started just like every other, with a stop in Karon for breakfast followed by a few hours spent lounging on the southern tip of Patong Beach reading, splashing in the waves and soaking in the sun. After that we decided to check out Phuket Town on the other side of the island so we mounted up and rolled up and through the mountains. We found Phuket Town quite easily and then drove around randomly trying to find somewhere to eat. I was leading the way and just following the main flow of traffic. I'm notoriously bad at making decisions and I'm sure we passed up plenty of good places before I was running on E and had to stop for gas. Ben then took the lead and we again began racing around Phuket. After a while we finally found an outdoor sea food place, had a nice meal, and mounted up to head back towards Karon. We stopped along the way at Phuket Bay and several other breathtaking places. On the east side of the island the bays are all perfectly calm and fisherman could be seen several hundred yards out in the water and only calf-deep in water. I've commented several times that if you can't find happiness, peace, and serenity here, you won't find it anywhere. This place is the most beautiful, peaceful, awe-inspiring place I can imagine. I can't wait to call it home for a few months this time next year.

On the way home the road signs again proved to be problematic and we had to back-track a bit to eventually find our way home. Riding in the dark is always slightly more of an adventure and it can make spotting the few road signs more difficult. We arrived back in Karon and decided to head back to Patong to dip our feet in the water and get something to eat. The ride between Karon and Patong, probably 10 minutes, is one of the most scenic stretches on the island and it also is one of the most fun rides on the bikes with lots of tight turns and big hills. We enjoyed the water/sand for awhile and then had a meal at an upscale place along the shore. We were probably the only two people on a 5 mile long beach, and although it was after dark, I'm still amazed how empty this place seems in the summer. I had the "Taste of Thailand" which was a sampling of 5 different Thai dishes and it was very tasty. We're now back in the hotel taking showers, watching CNN, blogging, and getting ready for tomorrow's adventures.

Take it easy, but take it.

Phuket - Day 3

Day 3

Day three in Phuket started with breakfast in downtown Karon and a drive to check out Kamala Beach. This turned out to be more difficult that you'd assume. See, Thailand is a third world country and Phuket has dozens of beaches. Those two factors combine to create a situation where road signs are infrequent, inaccurate, and, sometimes, just totally lacking. Essentially what you need to do is get a general idea where the beach should be and then just head that direction. We ended up roaming some really narrow, residential streets in Kalama before finally stumbling upon the beach.

At this point I'm going to skip describing the random beaches and just say this: they are ALL incredible. I've seen beaches in the Greek Islands, Mexico, Florida, etc etc and none of them could even be mentioned in the same breath as the beaches of Phuket. The water is crystal clear and totally free of debris or seaweed or anything. The waves range from still water in some bays to nice, rolling breakers on others. The sand is super fine grain and, like the water, is absolutely spotless. For about $2 you can get a chair with an umbrella and basically enjoy life.

After a quick swim and some time lounging on the beach I commented that it looked like it might rain. About 2 minutes later it was a downpour. We managed to find a beach restaurant just in time and watched the rain roll in from the comfort of a covered patio. It rained for about 45 minutes then it let up to a fine mist. We decided it was time to make a break for it and rolled out in search of more waterfalls in the center of the island.

Notice I didn't say it had stopped raining. It was misting, which when you're riding along mountain hills at 50mph is enough to get you pretty soaked. I feel silly admitting this, but at one point, I was actually cold. I didn't think cold was possible in Thailand. After about 20 minutes of riding the rain completely stopped, the sun returned, and all was well with the world.

Finding the waterfalls proved to be impossible. We kept checking maps, following road signs, and coming to dead ends. All was not lost as we got to see some pretty nice countryside and any time spent riding the motorbikes around is fun anyway. After a few hours of searching we headed back to the hotel for a shower to prepare for the nights festivities: Muai Thai Boxing.

We decided to take a "tuk tuk" taxi to the boxing stadium because we were under the impression that it was in Phuket Town and we had no idea how to find it. Tuk tuks almost warrant a entire blog but I'll sum them up as best I can. In Bangkok they have three wheeled taxis where the front on a motorcycle and the customers ride in the back in a crudely fashioned cab. The name "tuk tuk" refers to the fact that they have 3 wheels. Well, in Phuket they keep the name but change design. Here they basically have mini Safari buses. It is like a tiny conversion van where the back is open air. I'll include a picture so you know what I am trying to describe.

Tuk tuks, along with massage parlors and suit tailors, are the most annoying thing in Phuket. Everywhere you go in Patong these jerks constantly come up going, "Tuk tuk?" over and over. You can't go 10 feet without seeing a tuk tuk yet they feel the need to constantly ask if you're searching for one. Despite their annoyance they are pretty cool looking and I thought it would be fun to ride in one so we hiked downtown and went to where they usually hang out in Karon.

We somehow got screwed royally and ended up in a normal van. Also, the boxing stadium is in Patong, not Phuket City, and seeing how we go to Patong twice or three times a day we easily could have ridden there ourselves, especially if we weren't going to get an authentic tuk tuk ride. We arrived at Bangla Boxing Stadium, bought "VIP" tickets in the 2nd row for about $50, and we to have some dinner before the action started. We settled on an Irish pub, ate a nice meal, played a game of darts, and headed back.

Funny side story. I'm not a watch wearer and I don't carry my Korean cell phone around with me so Ben's watch is our only source of telling time. Today, on the 5th day, we realized that his watch has been an hour early this whole time. It just shows how relaxed our vacation has been that we've been living an hour a head of time without ever encountering a scenario where it mattered.

So we arrived at the stadium at what we thought was 9 p.m., which is when the fights were supposed to start. Of course, knowing what you now know, we were an hour early. We sat listening to the propaganda message that was playing over the loud speakers outside over and over and over. It swear to God it was like torture. They should try that at Guatanamo.

The actual Thai boxing was awesome. The first fight was a bit awkward though. It was two kids, who were maybe 8 or 9, weighing 60 lbs, kicking and punching each other. The lady behind me said it best when she commented, "I just want to give him a hug." We were sitting next to a really friendly Aussie who just before the fight commented "100 on red?" and I insta-accepted. 100 Thai baht is about $3 but enough to keep it fun. We alternated picking fighters throughout the night and I ended up winning 100B after losing 300B on the main event.

The fights were incredibly action packed. After the kids were done the next fight ended in a first round KO. Actually, most of the fights ended in knockouts. There were some really brutal fights, including one where a white guy got a huge cut above his eye. People at the scorer's table were shielding themselves with paper to avoid getting splattered. In the aftermath we found a drop of blood on our program so, rest assured, our VIP seats put us in the middle of the action. The best fight of the night was a title fight for some obscure belt. This old asshole was in the ring doing all this showboating and showmanship before the fight. I'm all for doing the traditional Thai rituals before the fight but this guy was actually taunting his opponent and playing to the crowd. He also did a cartwheel during the fight, totally for show. He reminded me of Apollo Creed in Rocky 3 when he knew he couldn't win but he was more concerned with putting on a show. Well, this guy ended about the same way Apollo did. Late in the first round his opponent landed a vicious left hand and he went down like a sack of potatoes. I went apeshit. "Apollo" was really out of it and he couldn't walk out of the ring under his own power. He was just stumbling around like he was blackout drunk with this "What the hell just happened?" look on his face. Justice was served.

Take it easy, but take it.

Phuket - Day 2

Phuket, Thailad -- Day Two

After another restful night Ben and I departed the hotel around 11 for another day of exploring and enjoying everything Phuket has to offer. We stopped downtown for a quick breakfast and unknowingly parked our scooters on the wrong side of the road. They have an "even days" side and an "odd days" side and we made the mistake of taking the even side on the 27th. We come back from breakfast to find our bikes ticketed and locked together. Oh boy.

So we hike back to the hotel in the searing sun and sheepishly explain our mistake to the ladies at the front desk. They laugh and eventually give us a free lift to the police station to pay our fine (about $15 each). Several comical things happened at the police station. First, when we gave the guy our money he just put it in his pocket. I understand this is basically extortion from tourists but I'd like to see them try to hide it a bit. Second he asked for our names and then just scribbled something in Thai. I didn't explain how to spell my name, I didn't show ID, nothing. I then signed three pieces of paper and got on his walkie-talkie, presumably to get our "hogs" unlocked. We ride back to the hotel and walk back down to where we left our bikes. First, and hopefully last, encounter with Thai police went about as well as we could have possibly hoped.

We got back down by the beach and they were still locked together so we decided to get a drink across the street and keep an eye out for the officer to come so we could move them to the proper side immediately to avoid being ticketed again. Just as we sat down he showed up and we moved them across the street and went back to finish our beer/Sprite. One of the annoying suit salesman that pestered us the first night spotted us and joined our table to once again try to force his wears on us. We slammed the drinks and walked back around the corner. The bikes were gone.

Luckily someone had just moved them to the other side of the small parking lot but my heart sure sank when I noticed my "black beauty" wasn't where I left her. After all that excitement we rolled out towards Kata Beach after a quick stop for fuel. They have a handful of proper gas stations here but 90% are just roadside stands where they have glass bottles full of gas that they sell for a set price. You roll up, open the gas tank and tell them how many bottles you want. Pretty nice and convenient.

So after a quick swim at Kata Beach to cool off we decided to go check out "The Big Buddha of Phuket." In our adventures we had repeatedly seen a monstrous white Buddha statue on the top of one of the mountains. We rolled towards Chalong and again got stopped by a police check point where they glanced at our licenses and waved us through. We then took a side street and began zig-zagging up a mountain road towards the Buddha. It is so surreal to be riding a moped up a jungle, mountain road. There were elephants and jungle as far as the eye can see. At the top there was a 45 meter tall Buddha and some fantastic views of the island. I forgot my camera today but I'm sure Ben will be kind enough to share his photos with me so I'll add them in due time.

After the Buddha we rode back to Patong to grab a bite to eat. After downing some personal pan pizzas we set off towards Kathu Waterfall. So just so you're following, so far today we've swam at a beautiful beach, saw an amazing religious monument, and now we're off towards a jungle waterfall. This all in the span of about 3 hours. It should be clear why I'm falling more in love with this place by the hour.

The actual waterfall was at the end of another long, winding road. As far as I could tell we were the other two people there. We hiked up through the thick jungle to find a beautiful, crystal clear waterfall cascading down the side of this mountain. It might have been no Niagra in terms of size but this was just as beautiful and surreal. It was approximately 156 degrees with 111% humidity so I was sweating quite heavily after hundreds upon hundreds of stairs. I jumped in the cool water and splashed around a bit to bring my core body temperature down to reasonable levels. I had one of those "Wow, I'm so incredibly lucky to be here" moments as Ben and I stood ankle deep in a mountain waterfall pool without another human for probably a mile. It is somewhat like Phuket is our own private playground thanks to the scooters. We just cruise for mile upon mile in whatever direction we feel like. After the waterfall we took a really nice, hour long ride through the center of the island just enjoying the scooters and enjoying the view.

Just before sunset we pulled into Surin Beach and watched the waves breaking as the sunset. I again cannot do the beauty and awesomeness of this moment justice. This is technically the "low" seasons in terms of tourism so everywhere you go you basically have the place to yourself. There were maybe 2 dozen other people on a several mile long beach. The sunset was incredible and after that we spent maybe an hour just walking the length of the beach, soaking it all in. I made friends with one of the countless stray dogs who joined up making us a trio. The stray dogs in Phuket are pretty cool. They're all reasonably clean, they're all well fed, and best of all, they're friendly but not annoying. They'll gladly let you pet them but they don't pester you for food.

After that we enjoyed a meal right on the beach in a tiki hut. This is the type of meal that you dream of having. I'm sitting here eating a delicious meal, drinking a cold beer, enjoying great company, all the while being no more than 10 feet from the beach and 50 feet from the waves breaking. After that we jumped on our bikes and headed back home. Getting really comfortable on the bikes by now and they're probably my second favorite part of Phuket behind only the beaches. It is so fun to just be able to cruise freely with a nice cool breeze on your face. It is really like we can go anywhere and do anything thanks to the bikes.

We're back in the room now recording our thoughts from the day, taking showers, and getting ready for bed. Tomorrow we're going to check out Phuket Town and probably spend some quality time on a beach. Tomorrow night we're going to go to the big Muai Thai boxing match which promises to be a good time.

Take it easy, but take it.

Phuket - Day 1

Well, we've been in Thailand about 24 hours and I'd rate them as 24 of the best hours of my entire life. I cannot begin to express the beauty and wonderment that is the fine island of Phuket, Thailand. When my contract is up in Korea I planned on heading home for awhile and then traveling abroad. I would say I'm 99% certain that I will make Thailand my destination. This place is as close to heaven on Earth as I can imagine.

Last night we landed just as the sunset in Phuket. I would like to mention that we had three international flights on three different Asian airlines and every single one was either on time or early. I was dreading all the possibly nightmares of a double layover trip but Asia effeciency did not disappoint and we arrived exactly when Orbitz said we would. We exchanged our cash and caught a cab to our hotel. Initial reactions: it is hot. I'm talking 95 degrees with 100% humidity, even at 10 at night. They drive on the wrong side of the road and the steering wheel is on the right side of the car. Everyone was on scooters, motorbikes, and mopeds (more on this later). So we zig-zagged for about an hour before we arrived at our hotel, Karon Living Room Hotel, which is on the south-east corner of the island, about 2 minutes from Karon Beach, 5 minutes from Kata Beach, and 10 minutes from Patong Beach. We wandered around a bit on foot, saw Karon Beach in the dark, and ate our first meal which brings me to the first thing I love about Thailand.

Things are stupidly cheap. At dinner I had a Thai noodle/chicken dish and giant beer for about $3. Three dollars. I tipped 25% just because I felt guilty eating so cheaply. I should mention our hotel cost a total of $98 for a week for 2 people. It is completely adequate in every way for $49 each. Silly. You do have to deal with Thai currency, the Baht, which has a strange conversion rate. $1 = 33 baht so you constantly have to do somewhat difficult division in your head to figure how much you're spending. The money also all looks the same so it takes me 5 seconds to figure out how much each bill is worth. They're just different shades of red and they all have a picture of the King of Thailand to make things ever more confusing.

We also encountered what will certainly be one of my major complaints about Thailand: people trying to sell you shit you don't want. Two different guys stopped us (first mistake was stopping) to try to sell us "Armani" suits. I'm sweating like a whore in church and this dude is trying to push off some crappy suit on me. They are pros of the "just one minute, no buying, just look" routine which is incredibly irritating. All day today people were hounding us to buy massages, t-shirts, Thai boxing tickets and last, but certainly not least, tickets to "Ping Pong Shows." I know a lot of my family reads this so I'll spare you the details of what a "Ping Pong Show" actually is, but a quick Google search would clear up any ambiguity. Nothing annoys me more than pushy salespeople, especially for something so vulgar. I know this stuff happens everywhere in tourist destinations, but I think the level of desperation and 'pushiness' is probably increased in a third world country. I mean, I recognize that this is a restaurant or a t-shirt stand or a sex show; if I was interested I'd inquire. I don't need personalized advertisements thrown in my face as I walk past. I can't believe anyone would walk by and be like, "Oh, yah, now that you mention it, I am hungry/I do need a t-shirt/I am a pervent." People on vacation may be impulsive but certainly no one is making dinner decisions based on some jerk with a menu stopping him on the sidewalk, right? If anything, I avoid places like that out of spite.

Anyways, we woke up today feeling well rested and we decided to rent scooters to explore the island. What a riot. Here we are, on the wrong side of the road, flying up and down these curvy mountain roads on mopeds all day. The views were so spectacular that no blog, no photo, nothing could do them justice. This is certainly the most beautiful place I've ever been, hands down, no doubt about it. The mopeds cost about $6 a day and we spent about $5 each in gas all day. We didn't need insurance, a license, anything. Just handed them $6 and they gave us keys and a helmet. We spent the rest of the day exploring all corners of the island. By the end of the day I felt like a pro, weaving in and out of traffic and zipping around mountains in the dark without a care in the world. Ben put it best, the mopeds are a "calculated risk" so we're just taking it easy and enjoying the views.

We started at Patong Beach, which is probably my favorite so far. It is literally miles of white sand beach with perfectly clear water and the most beautiful backdrop imaginable. The water is all different shades of blue and is completely free of any trash, debris, anything. The sand is so fine it almost squeaks under your feet. After taking a quick swim. We then cruised up the coast further, seeing many small towns and countless breath-taking views. Again, I'm going to post pictures but they'll in no way do any justice to this place. In total we saw probably 5 of the most stunning beaches I've ever encountered and put a few miles on our "bikes." We spent a few hours jumping in waves and sitting on the beach just repeating, "Wow, this is so awesome." "God damn, this is great." "I can't believe we're here." "This is heaven." etc etc. There are probably straigher, faster routes to get around but we prefer the road that hugs the coastline and at several spots we just pulled over to take pictures of the waves breaking on the rocks below or of the next beach we were about to encounter.

Some other highlights were turning one of the countless hairpin turns coming down a mountain and seeing a man riding and elephant across the road. Oh yeah, elephant crossing, no big deal. At another point a small snake dropped out of a tree on to the road right in front of me. I just missed creating some really unique roadkill with my moped. We ate at a small Thai restaurant for lunch and a Mexican place for dinner. I think I spent about $10 total on food today on meals that would have easily cost twice that plus tip at home. It is sickening how far your money goes in Phuket.

After dinner we wandered the area of Patong a bit. In my Thailand research I learned that Patong is sort of the "shadiest" part of Phuket and I must say the time I spent walking around supported that reputation. Countless bars were full of scantly clad Thai women who will gladly keep you company--for a cost. That and the frickin' Ping Pong Pushers made realize that Patong is probably not the type of place you'd want to take your family after dark. It in no way detracted from the daytime beauty but it did put in perspective that Thailand has some alternative types of "tourism" that aren't exactly wholesome.

It is currently about 10 p.m. on our first full day and I'm spent. I have a solid sunburn despite applying sun screen about 10 times during the day. Probably going to watch some CNN (haven't watched TV in over 4 months, it feels so strange) and pass out. Rinse and repeat tomorrow, with less exploring and more drinking beer on a beach.

Take it easy, but take it.

Goodbye Korea, Hello Thailand

Well, it is officially Talkster summer vacation. It is currently 6:56 a.m. and Ben and I are sitting in the terminal at Incheon Airport outside of Seoul. We're taking a week long holiday on the beaches of Phuket, Thailand. Aside from having to leave Suwon at 5:15 this morning everything has went perfectly so far. Airport shuttle was super quick and absolutely zero lines for security and customs. I'd estimate we spent about 10 minutes between the time we entered the terminal and when we reached our gate. Every time I fly internationally I'm impressed with other countrys' ability to effectively manage an airport. Whenever you fly domestically at home you have delays, long lines, cancellations, and it is generally about on par with a dental cleaning. Just flying from Chicago to Saginaw caused me more headaches than I care to mention. Somehow the rest of the world's airlines have solved this Rubic's Cube of effectively managing people; perhaps this is why U.S. air carriers are all bankrupt? Hopefully the other two legs of our journey today go as smoothly (layovers in Hong Kong and Kaula Lampur, Malaysia) and we'll be in Thailand this evening sipping beers on a beach.

Expect tons of pictures and blogs during/after Thailand. I would say if I could choose one place in the world to visit, Thailand would be it. I've been fascinated by this country for quite some time and I can't begin to tell you how giddy I am to be finally going.

EDIT #1: Currently in Hong Kong sitting at the gate awaiting our flight to Malaysia. Trying to get to the gate was quite humorous. Every time we joined a line to go through security they would close that line and direct us to another check-point. We walked back and forth, back and forth between the same two check-points for 15 minutes before they finally led a group of us back through the terminal. Then the (presumably) Chinese woman in front of me in line tried to go through security with a cordless drill case full of plants. She looked shocked when they asked her to step aside so they could investigate. Also of note, both Incheon and Hong Kong International are far nicer airports than I've ever encountered in the U.S. Really impressive architecture, nice layout, extremely clean, and, most important, well organized. Every step of the way there was an English speaker to make sure we were headed in the right direction.

Take it easy, but take it.

A weekend to remember

This past weekend is quite easily the most ridiculous 2 day stretch since I've been in Korea. I probably can't do it justice in a blog but I'm going to try.

Friday night we ate dinner at our usually spot and then the four of us (myself, Ben, Charlie, and Haji) went to check out a place called "Wa Bar" that Haji had told us about. It is apparently a popular foreigner hang-out, it is closer than NOW Bar, and we all needed a change of pace anyway. We ate french fries, drank beer, and argued about the need for a playoff system in college football. Actually, we didn't argue about that at all, anyone with half a brain knows that the BCS is total crap. Anyway, after a bit we start chatting with a couple sitting next to us. This is where things get interesting.

Emily, a native Korean, and Alan, a teacher from Ohio, join our table and the night gets slightly ridiculous. Long story short, Haji leaves (after picking up the tab, what a boss, right?) but before he goes the idea of norebang is introduced into conversation and he strongly suggests that we do it. Now, before I came to Korea my idea of karaoke was the embarrassing experience of singing in front of a bar full of strangers. Norebang (literally "Sing Room") is different. First, you have a private room. There are two microphones, a handful of tambourines, and a remote control where you enter the song you want to sing. So with our new friends leading the way we proceed to spend a really hilarious 2 hours in this room singing Boyz 2 Men, Dr. Dre, and even "Play that Funky Music White Boy." I cannot even begin to express how funny this whole thing was. The best part was when our hour was up we weren't ready to leave so Charlie decides to go barter with the people to give us more time. I believe the quote was, "How much until 3 o'clock? We're gonna do some epic shit!" Drunken norebang was a fantastic time to say the least.

So that brings us to Saturday. We made plans to meet with Emily and go to this bar/club called "Monkey Beach" in Seoul. We spent the afternoon playing screen golf (another 40 for me on the front 9 at Pebble Beach including a horrendous 5 on a 89 yard par 3). After golf we came back, changed, and met up with Emily at Suwon Station. After a 90 minute journey on the subway with 2 transfers we arrived in Apgujeong and met up with Emily's friend. So this guy introduces himself as "DJ Kim" and we later find out he is paying $800 a month to train to be in a boy band. So now it is the trio, Emily, and DJ Kim. We grabbed a quick bite to eat and headed into Monkey Beach.

So the club is a Thai themed bar which is funny considered Ben and I are going to Thailand next week. It was really a typical bar with a few expections. First, the cocktails we served in giant buckets. For $15 you could get a bucket of mixed drink that had EIGHT shots. That's right, eight shots. So, it goes without saying, that after two buckets it was time to dance. And dance we did. Everyone is basically dancing on this 50 foot long picnic table. A great time was had by all. The other awesome thing about Monkey Beach was they had a guy in a Halloween mask walking around playing a game. If you beat him in Rock-paper-scissors you got a free shot. If he won he got to whack you on the head with a plastic hammer. I obviously lost and took a beating. Charlie redeemed our group and took him down.

So, yeah, it was absolutely ridiculous and I spent most of yesterday recovering. Ben and I head to Thailand on Saturday so there will be plenty of things to blog about soon. I hope everyone is doing well. I miss and love you all. Take it easy, but take it.

Photo Blog

Here are some pictures from my recent adventures. Blogger won't let me re-order them nor does it publish them in any sort of discernible fashion. After about 30 minutes of frustrating trying to make it look decent I'm giving up. Just look and enjoy. If you click the pictures you can see a bigger, higher quality version.

Totally legitmate soccer fan right there, ladies and gentlemen.

Charlie, Ben, and I after the game. Looking really authentic with our scarfs on loan from Hans.

Great view.

The gang during the game.

Inside the stadium about an hour before kick-off.

Alex and I inside Suwon's Big Bird Stadium.

Big Bird Stadium from the street.

Ian, Alex, Charlie, Hans, Ben, and I before the game at a dak galbi restaurant.

One of my favorite foods on the entire planet.

Charlie digging in. See my last blog for more info about our love of this food.

I found a burrito restaurant in Seoul. Happiest moment in awhile.

The next four are from the 3rd Annual World DJ festival. It was basically an all night dance party on the bank of the Han River. I may or may not have blogged about it; I can't remember. It was a really incredible time.

Korean 4th of July

Well, my first ever Indepedence Day outside of U.S. borders was a great one. I had such a great time yesterday that I felt a blog was in order. I also managed to take some pictures so I'll post those at the end of the blog.

First, I have to introduce a new character into the blog. Han Sang Hyun (Hans for short) is the assistant manager of the local Baskin Robbins. We've recently become good friends with him and have been hanging out with him a fair bit outside the confines of our frequent ice cream runs. He is easily one of the 5 nicest people I've ever met. This guy is literally bending over backwards to make sure we're taken care of and we all sincerely appreciate his efforts. It is so cool to think we made such a good friend just because we like ice cream and we speak English.

Hans is a huge soccer fan, so he and Ben are always talking about soccer when we go get ice cream. About a month ago he suggested we should all go to a Suwon Bluewings game together. We settled on going yesterday because in Korea July 4th is just the day between July 3rd and 5th. Hans did a great job of planning out the whole day for us. We met up with Hans at BR wearing our blue shirts (obviously have to look like true fans) and then set off to get some food before the game.

Another side story: one of our favorite restaurants suddenly closed about 2 weeks ago. One day we showed up and it was boarded up. Now it is some kind of lotion store. We were devastated. They served one of our favorite Korean foods and Ben, Charlie, and myself have all been craving dak galbi something awful ever since. Well, luckily our boy Hans was able to show us another dak galbi restaurant. It may sound crazy, but this was easily one of the highlights of the day for me. I can now sleep easily knowing we'll be able to get out weekly dak galbi fix again.

Oh, I should do a roll call of the day's adventure. The group consisted of myself, Charlie, Ben, Hans, Alex and Ian (Dad, don't worry, I now have pictures of everyone). So after we ate our delicous meal we wandered over to KFC to load up on some food for half-time. Hans had this huge duffel bag he lugged around all day that was full of everything we could ever want or need. He had bottles of water, soda, Suwon t-shirts, soccer scarfs, and now a family size bucket of chicken. Did I mention how nice of a guy he is? In Korea you can just carry in a huge duffel of food for yourself which is in stark contrast to the Big House where they basically cavity search you upon entering the place.

Next we jumped in some cabs and rolled over to the stadium. I must admit, I was quite impressed. The 44,000 seat stadium was really beautiful and for $8 we had pretty sweet seats in the "supporter" section. Now I'm not entirely familiar with the workings of professional soccer, but I do know the fans are pretty much lunatics and Suwon's fans were no exception. They stood, clapped, and chanted pretty much the whole game. We managed to work out a few of the chants despite our lack of Korean. Hans gave Ben and I the rundown of the players and who to watch out for which made me feel like a more legitimate fan. We got some giant bottles of beer for $4 and settled down to watch the Bluewings take on Seongnam. The weather was absolutely perfect and we all were grinning ear to ear.

Again, I know next to nothing about soccer but Ben is pretty much 'The Schwab' of 'football' so I will default to his judgment on the level of play. The teams were certainly competitive but the game itself wasn't very sharp. Granted, most of my soccer watching is done on the International level at the World Cup so I should probably hold these guys to a lower standard. They didn't play much defense and basically just sprinted up and down the pitch the entire game, which I suppose was more exciting than the usual chess match nature of soccer. Suwon had a new Brazilian player playing in his first game and he happened to score the game's only goal. It was quite comical though. He was breaking down the field looking over his shoulder for the ball when it shockingly hit up directly in the back of the head. He regained his composure, broke in, and scored. Even Hans admitted it was quite a lucky goal. The fans went apeshit and all was well with the world.

Now I think soccer is a great game but I have one major complaint: the flopping. It seemed that every 5 minutes someone would be on the ground rolling around in pain. They'd stop the game, the trainer would run out, a golf cart would carry them off, and then 2 minutes later they're back in the game perfectly fine. It is all just a giant show to try and draw penalties but it seems quite ridiculous to me. It was so annoying to interrupt the flow of the game just so some asshole could pretend to be hurt.

It is worth mentioning that several Korean people asked to take pictures with us at the game as though we were celebrities. I don't think this occurance will ever stop being funny and awkward. First these high school boys down the row from us asked to take a picture with Alex. I mean, he's just sitting there watching the game, why would anyone want a picture with him? Then after the game we were down in the front row taking pictures near the field and these Koreans walked up and asked to snap a few pictures with us. Fair enough, let's take some more celebrity photos with strangers.

After the game we came back to the neighborhood and had some beers at the Ice Pub where we drank with Hans last week. A good time was had by all. After that Hans wanted to see our humble abodes so he came back and checked out our apartments and hung out playing video games with us.

All in all, probably one of my more memorable and enjoyable 4th of Julys. Great weather, exciting soccer, delicous food, cold beers, and fantastic company; what more could a guy ask for?

Talkster Photo

L to R: Ben, Kebin, Charrie, Josh-eee, and Haji

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day, Dad. Have a great day. Love you.

Kevin

Update

So it has been nearly 3 months since I arrived in Korea and it is finally starting to really feel like home. Every says that when you teach abroad the first three months are the "Honey Moon" phase where everything is new and exciting and interesting. They also say that months 3-6 are where you grow to hate Korea. I'm hoping the latter doesn't hold true for me.

To be perfectly honest, I really do love life in Korea. I've heard some people say that my blog has been lacking in the "culture" department lately but that is just a result life here becoming somewhat mundane. Things that fascinated me when I arrived don't even get a second glance any more. I'm fully adjusted to living in another culture and I'm feeling more Korean everyday. Looking back at the first month of blogging I had tons of exciting news to report and everyday I found something that I had never experience before in my 23 years. While Korea is an amazing place full of incredible sights, sounds, and experiences, after three months it just feels like home. I can't really blog about exciting, new things any more because, frankly, nothing is really that new to me anymore. I tend to spend my weekends being more low-key and relaxing rather than running around all corners of Suwon and Seoul exploring. It is easy to feel like this is some sort of wild vacation when you arrive; I suppose after 90 days you realize you're in for the long haul and sort of dig in. I do apologize for the lack of pictures. I really have no excuse; I'm just lazy and don't like carrying my camera in my pocket. I'll make a committed effort to post some pictures soon.

Also, I don't want my rants to be interpret ted as Korea hating. Many, many, many ESL teachers here spend their days complaining about things they hate about Korea and are constantly saying "Well, in the US..." or "If only Korea had..." and I really don't want to be like those people nor do I share their feelings. I came here to embrace a new culture and I've genuinely enjoyed the people, the food, the city, everything about Korea. But those who know me best know I love to rant and I need to keep the blog going so I try to find elements of the culture which are interesting and explain them the best I can. And, to be fair, I'd hate propaganda trucks anywhere.

I also want to see how I'm doing on my commitments for Korea.

1. Try everything once. I think I've done really well with this. I can't remember turning anything down (OK, I've skipped out on a few seemingly disgusting meals. read: boiled silk worms and minnow heads).

2. Learn the language. Well, I've royally failed in this department. I can read and write Hangul but I probably know about 20 words total. I read the other day that Korean is the 2nd hardest language to learn (behind Japanese) so I don't feel terrible. It is just so difficult to commit the required amount of time to learning a language when your days are spent teaching. I don't ever feel like waking up early in the morning to study. I get by quite well without Korean so nothing is really forcing my hand. I would love to speak Korean but I'm not willing to put in the time and effort. I'll continue to expand my vocabulary slowly. It is sort of funny the words I do know are so totally random because I learn them from kids; not sure when I'll need "vomit" or "dwarf" in conversation but I've got them down. At least now I can read signs, menus, etc. so I can survive completely without English if needed.

3. Travel. I've seen most of Suwon and a good chunk of Seoul. We've got some trips planned, both in Korea and also to other parts of Asia (Thailand and the Philippines specifically) so I feel OK about this commitment.

4. As I mentioned, I suck at taking pictures. I'll try to do better.

5. Staying in touch with friends and family has been quite easy thanks to the Internet. AIM/Skype/Facebook have really helped me stay connected with the people I care about most.

That's all for now. Take it easy but take it.

Examining American arrogance

Last week I was having a discussion with my Korean friend, Anna, and my British friend, Alex, about the world's perception of Americans. Not shockingly they said that their respective countries and, more widely, the world views Americans as arrogant. I did not find this surprising in the least. But then I gave it a little bit of thought and I began to wonder if perhaps we're arrogant for a reason. Perhaps our arrogance is somehow "justified" by world's other views about America.

I should initially admit that I do think most Americans are arrogant, at least in some form. Ask any American what the best country on the planet is and I think 99.9% of us would immediately respond America without a seconds hesitation. But I don't think this revelation is enough to condemn us as arrogant right off the bat. Ask any Korean which country is the world's best and they'd respond with Korea, Brits with England, Canadians with Canada. It is natural to inflate your own view of your country of origin. But if you ask Koreans why Korea is the best they might say things like, "Well, it just is" but when you ask an American they can begin listing actual reasons. I think examining those "reasons" we give is probably the key to understanding why we hold ourselves in such a high regard.

Let's think about it. How powerful is America? What influence do we actually have on the rest of the world? I'll start with our economy. We're in the midst of a major economic crisis and we're so powerful that the ripple effect caused by our economy has hurt every other major country's economy. Now, let's instead say France was in the midst of a depression: do you really think that would affect people in Korea? In Thailand? Perhaps, but certainly not to nearly the extent of an American depression. Everyone feels our pain. We buy all their goods and services, therefore when we go down, we pull everyone else down with us. Our currency, despite its recent woes, is still the world standard. When you hear someone talk about how the Yen, or Euro, or Pound is doing they're almost invariably talking about how it is doing relative to the US$. I don't think anyone can deny that America is the world's biggest, strongest, and most important economy to date. The Chinese, all 1.3B of them, are quickly catching up but we still are on top. When your country is capable of launching a global recession and your GDP is the largest in the world is is easy to develop a sense of economic arrogance.

Language. Why am I able to come to Korea with no teaching experience and get a high paying job teaching English? Because Koreans think it important that their children be able to communicate with Australians? I think not. English is the "language of business" which I take to mean it is the language that Americans do business in. I'm not trying to slight or belittle any other English speaking country, but I think if Americans spoke Russian that would be the language of business. Sure English is spoken plenty of places, but Koreans (and the rest of the developing world) are learning English as a direct consequence of that being the language spoken in the good 'ole U.S. of A. So not only is our economy the strongest in the world and our currency the world standard, but we dictate what has developed as the universal language that the rest of the world is teaching its children for the sake of advancement.

When is the last time you heard about a boatload of Cubans washing up on the shores of Australia? OK, I'll admit the analogy is a bit misguided but I think it illustrates my point. People from all over the world dream of coming to America. Why is that? Is it a giant American conspiracy to promote ourselves and validate our arrogance? I don't think so. I mean, come on, we're actively trying to keep these people out (read: Mexico) and people are still literally killing themselves trying to cross our borders. Now I think I am seeing a pattern where everyone else seems to think America is the best, or at least acknowledges that is the most powerful and more desirable place to live, grow, and prosper. With that is mind is it surprising that we're cocky? I'll make a sports example: If everyone else was saying, "Oh, yeah, Kevin is the strongest, best player on the team. He's dominated every aspect of the game every season" and I had every statistical record on the planet I think I would be a bit silly to not at least acknowledge that I am, in fact, probably the best. Do you think Michael Jordan is cocky? No, not at all. He was the best, we knew it and he knew it. He carried himself in a manner that, while respectful, clearly illustrated the mutual knowledge between him and everyone else that he was the best.

Finally, I think it is somehow mandatory for me to add military power. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this one but I think it is necessary to mention. When an armed conflict occurs anywhere in the world for the last 100 years we've been involved in some capacity. Now that might just be our nature to stick our noses where they don't belong but it is hard to imagine the Allies defeating Hitler without America. A tad closer to 'home,' South Korea owes its independence to the lives of American soldiers. Whether your agree with the US military decisions of the last 100 years is somewhat irrelevant. The fact is that when we flex our muscles the rest of the world has to take notice. When people are oppressed or in need of help, they look to us. We didn't amass all this power and status by being some 2nd class citizens to the rest of the world's countries. No, rather, you become the best by hard work and persistence. Our military might is unmatched and for that we deserve at least a tip of the hat from everyone else.

So, in closing, I absolutely think Americans are arrogant. But I also think we have some pretty good reason to be. Now, I'm not saying you should belittle other countries or turn your nose up at the rest of the world's population. There is a fine line between being confident and cocky, and perhaps too often we cross that line, giving off the impression of arrogance. When traveling or meeting other peoples you should be an ambassador for our country and reinforce all the positive things that the rest of the world already thinks about us. We're the land of the free, the home of the brave; let's keep it that way.

Take it easy, but take it.

Rant Three: Tough Kids

American kids are pussies.  There, I said it.  Now let me explain.

Korean kids have to be some of the toughest little ones the world has to offer. 

Example 1: Lily, a 7 year old, is leaning back in her chair.  She loses her balance, falling backwards to the floor, hitting her head squarely on the wall in the process.  I assume there is going to be a huge stream of tears and a messy situation.  Oh no.  Everyone starts laughing at Lily's misfortune and she gets up laughing.  I'm 23 years old and if I fall backwards in a chair and smack my head on the wall I certainly don't get up smiling but a 7 year old Korean girl who weights 50 lb. soaking wet thought it was hilarous.

Example 2: One day my students were lining up at the end of class and completely out of the blue one student punched another boy in the face.  And I mean he really punched him with everything he had and caught the kid squarely on the cheak.  Obviously my first reaction was to send him to the office and try to figure out what the hell ignited the incident.  My second reaction was, "Holy hell, how isn't he crying?"  Cosmo (great name, by the way) just stood there with a bewildered look on his face.  He didn't cry, he didn't even rub the spot where he was punched.  It was just such a shock to me that a 9 or 10 year old could take a punch and sort of shrug it off.

I could list more examples but I think you get the point: stuff happens where I fully expect tears and they just laugh and carry on.  I can say confidently that these things would not happen in the U.S.  Our kids cry for attention and apparently have very low pain tolerances.  Now, this isn't to say that I haven't seen kids in Korea cry, they just have a much higher threshold for what will induce tears.  Why is still a mystery to me.  It must be a cultural thing but I'm completely unsure as to why Korean kids are tougher, but trust me, they are.

Two blogs in one day, some kind of record?

Take it easy, but take it.

Rant Two: Propoganda Trucks

Well, to be completely fair, they aren't actually propoganda trucks.  They just sound like it.  About a two minute walk from my door there is an incredible market that goes on for blocks and blocks and happens to sell just about everything under the sun.  It is open really long hours and makes shopping for anything an absolute convience.

Which leads me to question why there is a need for pickup trucks to drive up and down my street with a loudspeaker mounting the roof announcing the fact that they're selling fruit, fish, or whatever the hell they have.  Obviously the loudspeaker needs to be loud enough to be heard indoors (otherwise you wouldn't know some guy has a flatbed of stinky ass fish outside your door, right?) which also means it is loud enough to wake you up.  Now I obviously have a slightly skewed sleep schedule due to working in the afternoon but being woken up every day by some guy selling shit I could buy 2 minutes away anyway is quite annoying.  Literally everyday I wake up to the tune of a guy selling shit which can all be purchased minutes away anyway.  I could understand if they had some rarities in the back of their truck but lemons, apples, etc. aren't exactly the Hope diamond.  They have their loudspeaker message on repeat and to me it sounds exactly like Nazi propoganda or the "Bring out ye' dead" guys from the Middle Ages.  Just some monotone announcment of "Fish for sale" over and over all day long.  How the drivers of the trucks maintain sanity is a pretty big mystery to me.

The thing is, this might make sense in the U.S. where people are inheritly lazy and there isn't a giant market 5 blocks away.  I could see people actually buying fruit/vegetables/fish/meat at a higher frequency if the guy was driving around the neighborhood with it all loaded in the back of a cart.  It would save you a trip to the grocery store and Americans are all about convience.  But Koreans aren't lazy and they have a fantastic market just minutes away.  Come to think of it, I never really see the guys in the trucks selling anything.  They're generally just driving around the streets without a customer in sight.  I assume they're charging a slightly higher price (for the convience) which may all but eliminate any chance they have of making high sales.  I assume most Koreans plan their meals ahead and don't make spontaneous fish purchasing decisions at 9 a.m.  But again, that's just me.

Take it easy, but take it.

Rant One: Staring

So it has been far too long since I last blogged.  I'm going to try and update more seriously, I promise.  In hopes that it will help I'm going to write a series of blogs on Korean things I didn't anticipate.  Today's topic: staring.

OK, I get it.  I'm not Korean therefore I don't fit in very well in this country.  That said, I'm still amazed how many people stare at me on a daily basis.  People stop and take pictures of us just walking around--literally just me standing on a subway or Ben and I walking down a sidewalk is a photo opportunity.  I would understand if I was in Sub-Saharan Africa where there is a legitimate chance they haven't been exposed to outsiders in any fashion but Korea is quite advanced.  They watch American movies, listen to our music, and teach their kids to speak English.  You would think they'd be less awe struck when they actually see one of us on the street.  I also understand that young kids stare and I'm totally fine with that but when 65 year old women stare at me the entire subway ride it makes me uncomfortable.  Aside from being tall and overweight I think I'm a pretty normal looking human being.  I don't have any deformities or a 3rd arm so I don't see what all the fuss is about.  I'm also going out of my way to try to fit in and avoid standing out so it makes it very frustrating when half the people around are burning holes in the back of my head as I stare out the bus window.

I guess it is like when celebrites get photographed in public and then it gets published in tabloids or celeb gossip blogs.  Oh my God!  Jessica Alba buying groceries?  Justin Timberlake going for a jog?  I always just wonder who gives a shit about that kind of nonsense?  I mean really folks, they're famous not aliens.  They go about the same mundane, daily shit that the rest of us do, they just look better doing it.  It is the same way for foreigners in Korea.  I don't know what they think foreigner teachers do when we're not teaching but everyone seems shocked that we live a pretty normal existence in their fine country which involves such radical adventures as eating, riding a bus, or buying groceries.  A perfect example was last week at our one of our favorite restaurants the apparent owner stood directly at the side of our table and silently watched us eat.  For minutes on end he stood there hovering over us.  I'm not sure how you say "awkward" in Korean but I should probably add it to my list of words to learn.  I mean, he was literally watching us put the food on the chopsticks, raise it to our mouths, chew, and swallow as if he expected me to stuff it up my nose or under my eyelid instead.  I felt like a rat in a lab experiment where my every move was closely monitored under a microscope.  He also rubbed Charlie's stomach as if to say "that is where the food goes" as if Chuck was unaware.

I suppose part of this whole dilemna is a cultural difference.  In the US you teach your kids not to stare at someone who is different because it is rude.  It makes them uncomfortable and brings to the forefront the fact that they're different.  I'll admit not staring goes against your natural inclination which is why I'll pardon the young kids staring under the guise of "they don't know better."  But in Korea it isn't rude to stare.  If there is something interesting happening, such as a 6'2"/200 lb. white man eating sushi, they don't want to miss any of the action so they just stare away.  When in Rome do as the Romans.  Well, when in Korea be stared at like a bearded lady I suppose.

I'll try to blog again tomorrow.  I have a long list of Korea rants so the blog should be moderately entertaining again in the near future.

Take it easy, but take it.